Deciding Vs. Choosing

Deciding or choosing?

These are two words that often are thought to be interchangeable; I submit they are not.

Deciding is the process of selecting between two or more alternatives, based on information. The problem is that once new information becomes available, the decision will likely be changed. And when even more information becomes available, the decision will likely be changed yet again. And again.

Choosing, on the other hand, is focused on the outcome one wants to create and thus is not dependent on information. The act of choosing creates intention and from intention flow results.

So the next time, dear reader, you find yourself on the cusp of a decision, take a step back and determine if you are deciding or choosing. Which do you want? Which one will create results for you?

God Is In The Gaps!

"The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth."

~Neils Bohr

And when we encounter such opposing and probably irreconcilably polarized positions, what then? Well, know this: frequently God can be found in those gaps between places of greatest tension. So when you find yourself in one of those philosophical LaGrange Points, celebrate! You may well have the opportunity to see the face of God!

Your Inner Terrorist

We all have two natures. One is the happy, excited, fulfilled, successful, “I feel good about me” nature that enables me to step out and do things I have never done before. The other is the fearful, withdrawn, “I’m not good enough” nature that makes me doubt myself and causes me to stay stuck in mediocrity and dissatisfaction.

These two natures are always in competition with each other and, unfortunately, the second nature seems to be the one where we go more easily, probably because it’s the one we know better and with which we are more comfortable.

Further, the second nature speaks to us in soft, sweet tones, such as “That’s very hard so it’s okay if you stop now” or “You don’t have to do that today; tomorrow’s good enough” or “Somebody else did that to you” or “You’re not good enough to have that.” These soft words cause us to lose our resolve and, of greater concern, cause us to stop pursuing our goals and dreams!

The biggest problem is that when we give in to this nature, it, like a terrorist, is never satisfied. The Israelis, for example, know never to negotiate with a terrorist because no matter what concession one makes, the terrorist always wants more.

If, for example, you listen today to the “tomorrow’s good enough” rationalization, well, come tomorrow the same argument is going to apply and you will be putting stuff off until the next day. Before you know it, the week is gone and you have achieved nothing. And then you get to feel crappy and beat yourself up, which, of course, suits the terrorist just fine.

Don’t listen to your inner terrorist! Your inner terrorist does not have your best interest at heart; he (or she) only has his interest at heart. When you make the changes in you that you say you want, the terrorist loses power and he doesn’t want that; he will not give up easily. The way to beat him is not to play his game. Never negotiate with your inner terrorist!

When your inner terrorist shows up, and he will, know that it’s a sign that you are on the brink of something worthwhile. Use that awareness as a trigger to strengthen your resolve, blow through the terrorist’s agenda, and create the success you deserve!

Never negotiate with your inner terrorist!

On The Nature Of Sin

I have been pondering on your question about sin. The process has caused me to organize my thoughts on the subject, and for that I thank you.

Here’s what I think, emphasis on what I think. This is my opinion, and it may or may not reflect accepted dogma. It may not even be right. But it seems to fit the evidence as I have experienced it.

We learned from Kimberly Zink and John Edwards, or earlier, that “every moment is a choice, and every choice has costs and benefits.” I believe that statement to be true, as far as it goes. What we often do not take into account is the fact that all our choices are interrelated. We tend to look at our choices as affecting ourselves and do not look at the effects they have on others. Some of the more empathetic of us can view our choices in light of the effects they have on our close family members or close co-workers, but I think very few ever consider that all of our choices are connected to all the choices available to everybody else in the world. Thus, a choice I make today in Scottsdale, Arizona affects Dean in Idaho Falls, Idaho but it also affects a pregnant mother in Nice, France and a ten year old boy in Taipei, Taiwan, and everyone else in the world. Conversely, a choice made by a factory worker in Turkey affects the choice set available to me and to you and the French lady, and so on.

This set of choices, available moment by moment to billions of people in the world, is so huge that we humans cannot even begin to comprehend it. But God can. Not only can He comprehend it, He can synthesize it and integrate it and see, moment by moment, the best possible outcome for all the choices. In His love for us, He then advises us, counsels us, on what the best selection for us will be. He does not compel us or order us to choose a certain way; He has given us freedom to choose and in His steadfast love He will not renege on His promise, but He does give us the benefit of His counsel. We hear it, I think, as the “still, small voice” that speaks to us from somewhere back behind the conscious portion of our brains.

The problem with all of this, of course, is that we don’t always listen. Let me rephrase that: I don’t always listen. I won’t speak for you but I must confess that I frequently listen to my desires of the moment, or to my fears, or to my programs, or even to the Evil One, rather than to the wise counsel of God. And when I do that, I am sure that God must be disappointed in me. He gave me talent, He gave me intelligence, He gives me good advice and I don’t even listen? How disappointing is that?

All of this takes me away from the face of God; it alienates me, it estranges me, to my own detriment. It is my loss and it is my own doing. That, my friend, is sin.

To be sure, none of these is a heinous act. I am not an axe murderer, I am not a rapist, I am not a homicide bomber. I don’t even rob convenience stores or run red lights. But I do commit small transgressions, small errors that estrange me from the glory of God. And I do that out of fear, out of pride, or anger or whatever, even when God has counseled me otherwise. The problem with this is that if I can’t be trusted with the small things, how can I be trusted with the big things?

Our Anglican liturgy includes a prayer called the Confession of Sin. Since our liturgy was taken largely from yours, I imagine you have a similar prayer. Ours reads in part that we have sinned against God “…by what we have done and by what we have left undone. We have not loved you [God} with our whole heart; We have not loved our neighbors as ourselves.”

These words are followed by words of repentance and a request for forgiveness. The good news is that God does forgive us; when I err and fall short of the glory of God, my Lord Jesus Christ lifts the burden of my transgressions from me so that I can once again start off fresh. Not that I have earned this forgiveness but it is grace, freely given by God through His son Jesus Christ. 

Thanks be to God.

Dreaming

The other evening I had the opportunity to attend a Klemmer & Associates Champions Workshop, this one facilitated by Scott Pullan. Scott did the workshop as well as I have ever seen it done, including one that I attended facilitated by Brian Klemmer.

One of the subjects Scott covered so aptly was the subect of dreaming. As I sat there listening to the discussion I realized that I don't have any well-defined dreams; what is up with that? I allowed myself to roam free for a few minutes and a dream popped into my consciousness, one that is so far "out there" that it only qualifies to be, well, a dream!

I have been mulling it over between then and now and the more I associate with it, the better I like it. The only "problem" I can see with it is that it lies well outside the bounds of probability (though not outside the bounds of possibility); it occurs to me that dreams don't have to be fettered by probability.

Another thing that occurs to me is that unless I create some change in myself, I won't get to have this dream. The dream is great but for it to come to pass, some action from me is required. What I have been doing up to now is not enough, based on results.

Knowing that creating a change in me can lead to this new dream is exciting and inspiring! Having a great big reward out there gives me great incentive to go forward!

I have been around the K&A track a number of times but this is the first time I have really gotten involved in this activity called dreaming. I highly recommend it.

Excellence

First off, excellence is not perfection; perfection is God’s business. Let’s be clear about that right up front.

Rather, excellence is simply me being the best I can be, moment by moment, knowing full well that the best I can be in any one moment may be better, or worse, than I can be in any other. And being okay with that, too.

You Create What You Believe

“You don’t create what you want, you create what you believe.”

~Brian Miller

If this is true, and I suspect it is because Brian Miller is one of the smartest guys I know about this sort of thing, then this is an excellent reason for having a coach or a mastermind.

Consider: if there’s something you say you want but you don’t have it, we can pretty well conclude that you don’t believe you should have it. That implies either a) you don’t really want it or b) you want something else more, such as not being afraid, staying comfortable or not straying outside the boundaries your programs have set for you.

Your coach and/or the members of your mastermind, because their backgrounds are different from yours, do not share your particular fears, devotion to comfort or set of programs. To be sure, they probably have their own set of limiters, but since those are different from yours, your coach and/or mastermind members can assist you in overcoming your obstacles. Literally, what appears to be a huge obstacle to you may not be anywhere so daunting to them and they can assist you in moving over, under, around or through it.

Your coach is skilled in helping you create solutions. He or she will help you find the answers you almost certainly already possess, if only you are willing to do the digging to ferret them out.

So the solution is right there in front of you. Of course, this assumes you believe in yourself enough to get off your butt and get involved with people who can help you make your dreams come true.